How to deal with tough days?
We've been grinding, we've been battling, it has been a rough ride, but we kept showing up and fighting. We have been having lots of deep runs, almost similarly to 2018 as we have also been bricking them, countless of final table bubbles.But day in day out, we kept grinding, registering and battling and I was getting more and more exhausted, it drains you. Saturday I became aware of it, having thoughts such as "bubbled another final table", "not again...". These are signs that it is time to take a break.
So that's what I have been doing Sunday and Monday. When you are so caught up in grinding and being in that rhythm, unnoticeably you lose perspective, you lose direction, it drains you... and you end up in a place you rather do not want to be in.I lost my streak somehow in Headspace, while I meditated each day, so was less inclined to pick that up again.. so things started going downhill. But that is what those blogs are for! Holding yourself accountable but also knowing what you are doing it for, what goals you have set for yourself.. it's tough to remind yourself of all those things when you are working, your mind is constantly on the move and having different thoughts, which is totally natural and okay. But that makes it tough to end up where you want to be if you just follow your mind, that's why those blogs and taking breaks are so important.
You are not the only one
Anyway, the grind has been really tough like I mentioned and there are a lot of people going through the same thing. Which is first of all a thought that may help a lot of you, it may feel like you are the only one running so bad or not getting those big scores and with those feelings isolation and lose of confidence come along. So it is important to be aware of that it is not the case, everybody has those periods, even the best in the world have insanely long break-even periods, take Poker@luffyD for example, breakeven stretches of 30k games. Considering some "only" play 5k games a year and that most do not have the skill level he has... it can be even longer. So having not only the perspective that you are not the only one that may be running bad may help, but also the perspective that you get to play poker already means you have it better than so many people! It is important to realize those things.
Our ancestors also had it so much worse than we do, it may not always feel that way, but on the big scale it is just true, those are facts that can be checked by looking at numbers of illnesses, poverty.. war... Some people have to walk for hours to get fresh drinkwater and we are complaining that we didn't get that many likes? Or that we just lost AA vs KK? Like if you think about it, it is crazy we get upset over those things. It is all so meaningless, doesn't mean those things may not be annoying but we should be able to put things into perspective and that may help dealing with those things in a better way so we can continue to focus on what actually matters and things we can actually influence.
Focus on what you can control
One of the most important things we can influence, apart from making sure we are in the best mental condition, by blogging, meditating, having proper nutrition, exercising etc, is studying! Just taking a break from poker when things go poorly, is most likely not enough to change things. Nothing is gonna change without changing anything. I somewhat hate it when people say things will turn around. First of all because with that comes some sort of an expectation, you somewhat expect things to turn around soon. But that may not be the case, so very often it comes with disappointment and makes you sink even deeper. Plus it is passive, you hope for things to turn around. I rather work harder and try to turn things in my favor. Meaning studying. It is so easy to start autopiloting when you grind a lot, you assume things that you do are standard and fine, while that really may not be the case. That's why it is important to study, not only to learn new things and spot possible leaks, but also to prevent yourself from autopilotting.
Very often when you are studying you realize that you know very little. So you may start doubting things that you may have labelled as standard at first, which is only normal. But the more you study, the more you will regain confidence, because you are learning things, getting confirmation. And confidence is one of the most important things, because when you are going on a downswing, very often with that your confidence goes down as well, which will make you maybe not going thin enough for value in certain spots, missing bluff opportunities... it's for everyone different, but it does lower your winrate. That's why it is important to study, to maintain or regain that confidence. That's why I also very often give the advice to drop stakes, as your winrate is very often higher in the lower stakes, it is easier for you, so you can regain your confidence better there. Also because most likely you have already proven yourself before that you beat those stakes. Ego telling you you beat something, is different than actually having the results to back that up. That's why I prefer to grind my way up, so in case I do go on a downswing I can confidently drop down knowing I beat those stakes, so I can rebuild my roll and my confidence. Rather than moving up just because I had a big score/have the money and when then things go downhill... not knowing where you are at.
Meditating and blogging
Anyway, I hope this may help some of you if you are going through a rough grind. These things have always been helping me, recently added meditation which helps a lot putting things into perspective, being more in peace with things that happen, being more aware of things, being more present and many more things. So really recommend checking it out, it may all sound goofy but I can really recommend it. You can always hit me up if you want someone to talk to. We have a really active Discord channel where others also blog and share their experiences, so recommend to check that out and maybe also start your own blog, as I think it may help you a lot as well. It is tough to hold yourself accountable all the time and being able to reasses especially when things get tough and blogs help you to push you into those directions.
I will be back on the grind again tomorrow. I spent Sunday mainly on creating lots of content, been really tired past few days because of the grind as it is really draining when things are tough and you are trying to shift your mind all the time, trying to stay positive, help people etc. so Monday I took the day a little bit more for myself, I regained lots of perspective Sunday. So I sent out messages to a lot of people that have been supporting me, as that is what I am doing it all for, so it was good to remind myself of that and in the meantime let them know that they mean a lot to me and that together we form an amazing community that helps each other which is something that is extremely rare, so I am really grateful for that. I visited my grandmom, replied to all your kind messages and now I am writing this blog. Pretty tired but really satisfied and fired up for tomorrow!